When Rejection Is Not Rejection

Sometimes a rejection is not a rejection.

Handle all rejections like they're not really rejections.

Assume at all times that she's totally into you, as long as she's still there and you still have her attention.

You put your hand on her leg while she's talking, she picks it up and moves it away. But she's still sitting there talking to you. 

She says she only wants to be friends, she's not coming home with you tonight. But she's still there talking to you.

You lean in for the kiss, she moves away and doesn't let you. But she's still there talking to you, smiling now.

Repeat throughout the night.

'Rejection' after 'rejection'.

But she's still with you, smiling, enjoying your company.

You look deep into her eyes and tell her how she's got this strange effect on you that makes you so excited.

She tells you you're such a flirty guy, a total player. But she's smiling. 

Eventually, she comes back to your place so you can teach her the basic Bachata steps. It's on.

But your "dance lesson routine" which normally works on girls in three or four songs, still hasn't gotten her naked after ten songs.

She won't kiss you on the lips even though you've tried a dozen times while you're dancing, but you can get away with kissing her hair.

You lift up her skirt and grab her bum while dancing, she swipes your hand away. You don't apologize, but you encourage her to swipe your hand away any time she doesn't like something, telling her you want her to feel safe and comfortable.

She's having a great time dancing so you continue to dance.

You grab her face with both hands and kiss her. She kisses back, then pushes you gently away.

You tell her that's totally okay, and continue dancing. She's very happy.

She says that's enough dancing, that she had a great time and now it's time to go home. No problem you say, you really had a good time tonight.

You stop to drink some water, seems like she's going home now. You give her a goodbye hug and kiss her hair. Kiss her neck. Nibble on her ear.

Soon you're on the bed.

The story continues like this – you start to finger her, she loves it for a moment and then pushes your hand away.

No problem, assure her that that's totally fine and carry on kissing her.

Every step of the way has resistance – the kiss, every single item of clothing, etc – and every time she shows resistance, you (without apologizing) respect her wishes and stop doing whatever it was and go back to doing something she's okay with, assuring her that it's okay.

Then keep escalating. Try again later. It's a dance.

The rejections only making the date more exciting, and more challenging. More rewarding.  

A rejection is really only a rejection if she's gone. If she's still there standing in front of you, if you still have her attention, she's not rejecting you, she's 'dancing' with you.

Can you handle the rejections? Can you 'dance'? And I don't mean Bachata. I mean the back and forth of sexual advances and her rejections.

Having been through that I realize rejections on all levels can be like that. You meet a girl at a cafe and hit on her, she tells you she's not interested.

What are you gonna do? Walk away with your tail between your legs, or 'dance' with her?

Rejections are a crucial part of the seduction process.

They make it more exciting, more passionate, more special.

So in that sense, rejections are women's way of seducing you.

Remember that the next time you get rejected!

All the best,

Cleopatra